Do the “Opie”
When I was in my early 20s I had a Sunday school teacher named Larry Woolard that owned a lumberyard at the time but later became a state senator and very well-known man in our parts.
He gave me a lecture one day about how important it was sometimes to let people think that you don’t know as much as you really do and to feign ignorance, that way people will relax around you and reveal their true intentions and their true motives.
I have had many people react negatively to this concept and perceive it as inappropriate. Let me remind you that the Bible teaches, “be slow to anger” and “a soft answer turns away wrath” and finally “blessed are the peacemakers.” This concept is all about avoiding conflict without losing momentum.
I will never forget the lesson that Larry told me about not revealing everything that you know when you’re in discussions and interacting with other people. I accidentally came upon a form of this technique that I’ve used all my life and it is an adaptation of what Larry taught me. I call it doing the Opie. I was at a high school basketball game in a neighboring town. At halftime I got up to go over to the concession stand to get something to eat and a boy in a leather jacket like Fonzie’s from Happy Days, deliberately came up to me and slammed his shoulder into my shoulder. Now when I was at this stage in life I was 16 at the time and I was maybe 5 foot 5 inches and weighed about 130 pounds at the most. At first I didn’t know what to think about what this fellow was doing; so being startled, I just kind of turned real quick and looked him in the eye, waived and said, “Oh hey how ya doing!” The other fella looked at me stunned and walked away; he surely thought I was stupid. As I continued on my journey to get my soda and candy I realized that I just missed being beat to a pulp.
After that lesson I’ve used that same technique many times when people were trying to pick a fight or insulted me. At that time I was just a pup wet behind the ears and didn’t have a clue what was going on. It happened so fast that my instant reaction was to use the Opie on him without knowing it.
Now why I call it the Opie is I used to watch The Andy Griffith Show a lot and Opie as you all know was his son on the TV show. Opie would constantly be doing something wrong and his dad would catch him. Andy was such a great dad; he would sit there and he would talk to him. He could be stern, but he was kind and Opie would look up at his dad with those big sad eyes and that innocent little face and say, “Gee Pa, I didn’t know I was doing something wrong.”
For me doing the Opie is basically letting on that you don’t know that you’ve been insulted by someone because you are so dumb you didn’t even get it. It works wonders to let somebody think he or she has the upper hand and to let the person believe that you’re so naive you don’t know how to react. Then when the moment really counts you are able to overcome that person by accomplishing whatever it is you need to do and hopefully that is something that is correct, right, fair, just, and in the best interest of everyone around.
This technique works wonders for the office bully and the biggest advantage is that it lets you control the timetable of events. The timetable is the main advantage to doing the Opie. When you have an agenda for quick change and someone is constantly trying to hold you back or interrupt your plans with little fiery darts, just do the Opie and press on. It works. Remember the saying “Sometimes it is better to apologize later than to ask permission first.” I don’t usually care who gets the credit, or what people think about me. When all is said and done most people see the results and figure out who the stronger person really is.
I heard an old motivational tape 35 years ago where the man said, “When people tell me it can’t be done, I just look at them and say ‘Yeah, it can’t be done, but won’t it be fun doing it anyway?’”
Important Concept: The Opie is an honest way to buy time before you reveal your initial reaction. Opie doesn’t require you to say anything, and actually you shouldn’t. You could have the wrong impression of what was just said or done. Use time wisely and strategize what your course of action or reaction should be. Too many managers shoot from the hip and make very costly errors that they regret. Loose lips sink ships.